Size Matters, Says PNAS

Rupert heard hoots of laughter from the boardroom as he approached from his office.  As he entered, Betty said, “Of course it matters, we all know that.”  The others gathered around the table laughed.

Rupert said, “Ms. Lidalot, as Chair of this corporation, you should display a much more sober attitude before the Board.”

“Well, that’s about the size of it,” said CFO George Contenumbaes.  The others, including Betty, snickered and stifled giggles.

“Something is going on here,” Rupert said.  “Why is it the CEO is always the last to know?  So let’s hear it.”

Felicity Short, the Director from LotzMooreLute Capital, pushed a journal down the table and said, “It looks like that stuffy old National Academy of Sciences has people with a sense of humor after all.  Check out the bookmarked page.”

Rupert found the page, scanned the large-print title, and gasped.  It read, ‘Penis size interacts with body shape and height to influence male attractiveness.’ [1]

Betty said, “The National Academy is a very serious organization, charged with providing scientific leadership for the country.  The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences is a serious and prestigious journal. But their website does exhort you to add ‘PNAS Direct to Your Inbox.’  Doesn’t that sound a bit rude?”

“Well, there must be a potent evolutionary motivation at work,” said Ima Punk.

“What does any of this have to do with biotechnology?” Rupert asked.  “Must we behave like middle schoolers?”

“We must understand the wants and needs of our customers,” said Betty.



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